


If Only

by Lost_in_abyss



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-28 22:16:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20071480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lost_in_abyss/pseuds/Lost_in_abyss
Summary: So, this story is inspired from an anime named Orange. i watched it a long back and suddenly i remembered and wanted to write about my favorite duos. Enjoy!





	1. Chapter 1

Part-1

Tony was working in the lab as usual when he heard the news. His old favourites of AC/DC songs had swiftly transitioned to some new generation song with the same words ‘Don’t you let me go, tonight’. The fact that he wasn’t aware about the song change showed how much into he was in the work. But he felt himself distracted when the song ended abruptly. That was _unusual._

Worriedly he called upwards “Friday, babe you there?”

No answer.

He was wondering whether he should call for his suit when he saw a blue screen flicker right in front of the eyes. Then it displayed a new channel. It was a local one that focused in the neighbourhood. Tony didn’t understand why his AI was showing it until he read the headlines.

The spanner in his hand fell down with a thud.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

It was Rhodey who found him in the lab. Pepper was busy with a meeting in Stark Industries. Besides she rarely sought him out these days. They both decided that they would stay together until Morgan was twelve. After wards she could decide to whom she wanted to live with. In other words they were couple in front of media but truly separated. Not that Tony would complain.

“Tones, you okay buddy?” Rhodey asked warily looking at Tony staring transfixed in the blue screen which was repeating the same news again and again.

“Tony! Tony!” Rhodey called shaking the man who was slumped down in the work bench. That did the trick. Tony did look up but there were tears rolling down his eyes.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Tony nursed a glass of scotch as Rhodey sat beside him. He wanted to believe it but no matter how much he tried he couldn’t wrap it in his head.

“Friday, play it again”.

“Tony, No! How many times will you play it? It’s enough” Rhodey spoke sternly.

“No! NO! NO! Are you watching the news? Did you see that? ‘Peter Parker an intern of Stark industries and student of MIT University found dead in the apartment near the campus.’ Intern? Student? He was the FREAKING SPIDERMAN! He was the one who helped us TO DEFEAT THAT PURPLE BASTARD. He was the one who made me this prosthetic hand…. He is not just a student, not just an intern!!”

“There is a reason it was kept in secret, Tony. The world doesn’t know he was Spiderman. He was just a nerd student to others. Some prodigy who can never be one anymore” Rhodey answered seeing his friend breaking apart on the news of the kid. He wondered how Tony always was hit with such bad luck.

“WAS? WAS? He is not dead. He can’t be dead, Rhodey. How old is he? 23? Nobody can die at that age” Tony screamed broken.

“Tony, he killed himself. All we can do is to be there for his funeral. Be there for his family. Tony, please you can’t break apart like that”.

“Why him? Why would he? Why him?” Tony asked brokenly. The question ‘why not me?’ was left unspoken as Tony cried on his friend’s shoulder.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Tony stood in front of the mirror combing his hair again and again. The strands of grey hair was peeking out of his bronze hair. At the age of 43, Tony could positively say that he looked young despite his age. He was still the most desired man even though he had a kid of nine years. Yet nothing mattered today. His face looked shallow from the tears that he had shed. He didn’t even feel enough energy to go down the lab.

Two days. It has been two days since Peter’s death. _Can it be called death if someone took their own life away?_ Tony didn’t want to think about it.

The funeral was delayed for Ned’s sake. Ned- Peter’s friend was currently working with a NGO in India. He wanted to bid him farewell. Tony had thought that two days would help him realise the truth. But the fact that he asks Friday to contact Karen clearly showed otherwise.

_Whatever._

He dressed in the black suit that he had worn for Captain America’s funeral ceremony. He hated to admit that he missed the capsicle and was glad that they could end up in good terms towards the end.

Out in the porch stood Pepper holding Morgan’s hand, both of them wearing simple black dresses. There were no usual gimmicks from his kid instead found himself in a tight bear hug from Pepper.

“Shall we?” she asked quietly.

Tony could only nod as his response.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

_“Mr stark!” Peter called as he saw Tony returning from a business meeting. Despite handing the company over to Pepper, he was still compelled to attend few meetings. ‘Tony, you are what the people want’ that’s would Pepper say whenever he whined about those boring conferences._

_“What you doing here kid?” Tony asked looking at the boy shifting in his feet nervously._

_“Mr Stark, I… I need your help” Peter answered nervously still looking at his shoes._

_“Is it spidey trouble?” Tony asked quietly steering him into one of the empty conference room. “Did you get into trouble, Peter?” the older man asked narrowing his eyes in suspicion._

_“No!” Peter immediately blurted out and then continued in a voice barely more than a whisper “I need a suit”._

_“What was that?” Tony asked not being able to make out the words._

_“I NEED A SUIT” Peter spoke loudly. The kid’s cheeks were flushed._

_Tony stared at the boy for a long time. Why would he need a suit? Was he taking someone to date? But Tony didn’t dwell on the fact and instead replied “Here, you can take the credit card”. Tony tossed it to Peter nonchalantly._

_“I don’t need… money!” _

_“Then?” Tony asked amused at the sixteen year old kid who was turning red by minute._

_“I… I need advice. I don’t know what to wear Mr stark. What am I supposed to do. Should I wear black or brown or blue? How much does a good suit cost anyway? Will I even look good in it?” Peter was rambling in panic._

_“Whoa! Whoa! Hold on. You would look good, kid. You came to the right person for it but why you need a suit”._

_“It’s homecoming, Sir.” Peter replied rubbing his neck._

_“Ah, I see. How long it has been since mine? Guess it doesn’t matter. Old people like us could only look at you and feel happy”._

_“You… you are not old, sir. You are Iron man. Iron man is never too old”._

_“Yes. Yes. Fanboy” Tony replied smirking as he saw the kid blushing even more than before._

_“I … I am not! I am telling the truth!” Peter answered adamantly._

_“Yep. I heard you. Now let’s go” Tony answered already getting up grabbing the keys._

_“Where to, Mr Stark?” _

_“I thought you needed advise, Parker” Tony winked and sauntered out not seeing Peter clutching his torso in happiness._

_Twenty minutes later they were in a store with a bunch of assistants aiding to a confused Peter._

Xxxxxxxxxxx

“Peter looks good in the picture, doesn’t he?” Bruce asked looking at the picture displayed in front of the Church.

“It’s from his home coming day”.

“He looks happy” Banner replied wiping his glasses in his shirt. If there was one person who would miss Peter as much as Tony was the scientist turned hulk. Peter used to visit him frequently whenever he was around the tower

“_It’s fun to talk to him, Mr Stark”_. That was Peter’s reply. Of course he will find it intriguing to talk about quantum theory and inter dimensional findings. Peter was one of a kind. Yet Bruce seemed to hold up better than Tony.

Guess, losing so many people in his life would change a person.

The church was eerily quiet despite the number of people gathered around. Peter’s entire batch mates from school and university was there to pay respects. They might have been a bit surprised to see the entire avengers attending the ceremony. Even the winter soldier, Shuri and King of Wakanda was here.

Tony didn’t know how he walked up to the front. He nodded his head in acknowledgement to others when he passed by but didn’t deter from his stride.

There in the centre laid Peter wearing the suit that Tony brought him for graduation ceremony. Ever since Peter sought him for advice Tony made it a point to buy suits for his intern whenever he could. Every time Peter will complain that it was unnecessary and would later smile and thank him. Smiling- that was all Peter used to do whenever he was around his mentor.

Yet today he is not smiling. Arms crossed, eyes closed it looked like he has been sleeping from those tiring lab binges. It hurt to even think that this was the best way he had seen Peter throughout.

It hurt to think that in back of his mind Tony still find the kid attractive.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Fourteen days, 16 hours.

That’s so long Peter has been dead. It seemed like his death was just a news for the town. One dies, one gets washed away but world spins.

All through the years that people were snapped away, Tony never felt hopeless. Every night he worked on his experiments to bring back the dead people. Millions were lost and he was never hopeless.

Perhaps he was selfish then. He wanted the kid back. He wanted to see Peter living the life that he had wanted but never got.

_And he brought him back, didn’t he?_

He was even ready to die for the kid and was even half way through it. It was a miracle. A miracle that he survived even though half burnt. Even though he had prosthetic now, he was happy that he survived.

Then why did he feel so devastated by the news?

He still had the time machine. He could still jump back in time and stop Peter from killing himself. But what surety is there that the boy won’t do it again? What could he do if he didn’t know the reason?

Xxxxxxxxxxx

It was Rhodey who had asked to let world know that spider man had passed away. People were already speculating the disappearance of their friendly neighbourhood super hero. It would be no time before reporters will start asking for explanation from the avengers.

He knew that everyone would support his suggestion except Tony. The past few days Tony had entirely shut himself in lab wallowing in guilt and self-pity. When half of the world was erased too, Tony had shut himself in the lab but then he was working- researching.

Now, he was drinking. Not even Morgan was allowed into the lab. It won’t be easy but he knew that if he can’t do it, then there were a long line of people who would speak to Tony. After all Peter was everyone’s favourite.

Rhodey didn’t even think that Tony would come to the meeting. But here he was – eyes still red with exhaustion and smell of cigar and alcohol surrounding him. When was the last time the man took a shower? _Right no need to piss him off from the start._

“So what’s the sudden emergency? It seems like the eye patch and even Space capsicle is here.” Tony asked nonchalantly gesturing to Nick Fury and Captain Marvel.

“Tony, we need to speak about Peter” Doctor strange spoke up.

Tony froze at his intern’s name and tried his best not to show his panic “What about him?”

“I think we need to tell that spider man passed away in the mission” Captain Marvel suggested.

“Yeah may be hold a memorial for him” Sam replied nodding his head.

“We should honour his acts of valour, my friends. Build a statue reminiscing him. His tales should be regaled every year” Thor spoke patting Sam’s shoulder which made in turn the Falcon flinch.

“_You want to do what?” _Tony asked trying to comprehend what others were saying.

“We think spider man should be honoured. I have contacted Maria Hill to hold a memorial ceremony in the national museum. Statues, celebration whatever must be done to commemorate him.”

“_You want to conduct a memorial service. No shit Sherlock, this is not Batman or Gotham city to build an ugly statue to remember him. _There will be no celebrations in his name. Nothing. Nada. You wouldn’t do a single THING LIKE THAT!” Tony screamed in rage.

“With all due respect, it’s not your decision alone” Captain Marvel answered unfazed.

“It is my every fucking right to say that there won’t be any ceremony! Tell he is off the grid like Barton but no, he will not be announced dead to the world.”

“You recruited him but when he became an avenger, he became a part of team. It’s no longer your sole discretion to decide upon him, Mr Stark” Fury answered giving a look as if Tony was being childish.

“_Is that so? Do you know how he died, Director? He killed himself! If he was a part of team, why didn’t you check upon him? Why director? You only want someone when they are best at doing what you told, isn’t it? What about you all? Where were the FUCKING TEAM WHEN HE WAS CHOKING HIMSELF WITH A ROPE, HUH?” _

“Where were you then, TONY?” Banner asked in rage.

That stopped the billionaire from his sudden onslaught. He looked at his friend who was already regretting what he spoke out. He just prayed that Tony will not hate him. No, _he will hate him after this._ He just hoped that it won’t result in the appearance of Hulk.

But Tony’s reaction surprised everyone. He was calm as if the person who had thrown fit earlier was no longer around. His expression was closed off as he spoke with clarity-

“I will not stop you from conducting the memorial. _But if you do_, I will pull out all of my finances and aids from shield. I will leak all the secrets that you had tirelessly tried to conceal about yourself” and then staring at Banner he continued “I don’t care what personal monsters you hide or created but _I WILL _haunt each one of you. Never forget that I had a reputation before. I won’t stop unless you put an end to it” With that Tony sauntered back to his lab leaving the superheroes in frantic.

Three days later a press meeting was called by SHIELD and every one of the avengers team were present. If there were the queen of Asgard, Wakanda King and members of Guardians present, no one questioned.

Tony was given the task to speak in the conference. Wiping his face in Kerchief, Tony walked towards the podium in silence. Every reporters filled in the room waited patiently. After a brief pause to settle down Tony spoke “The meeting was called to address one of our team member’s important decision. The spider man who is already famous for protecting the civilians and crime fighting has decided to retire from avengers. He… he will be temporarily focusing on his personal matters.”

“Does that mean that spider man will no longer be available? Will he no longer be a part of the team?” One of the reporters asked.

Tony stood in silence trying to gather his thoughts. His hands were shaking yet he proceeded with the answer “Spiderman will always be a part of the team but as for whether he is available… it is… it was his own decision and that’s all I can tell for now”.

Tony looked at Rhodey and Rhodey took over the session but only after offering a comforting gesture to his friend. Even when Tony had held conference after his captivity, he was still all bite and snarky. The same arrogance continued afterwards no matter whatever happened. The fight in Siberia didn’t even deter Tony from being his usual flamboyant self. Yet now… Tony was shaking and his voice was breaking with broken sobs. It made him wonder how much his friend was hurting if he couldn’t hold the careless façade that he had mastered for so long.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Three months and twelve days later, Tony was still holed up in the lab with no music or light. He was idly working on one of his car partly for a reason to stay here. This was his routine now. Wake up. Eat. Drink. Drink. Stay in lab. Drink. Drink. Fall asleep. Sometimes he stumbled into his bed. Pepper would just shoot him a look or try to scold him.

Whatever. She doesn’t have to pretend that she cared.

“Boss” Friday spoke up.

“Not now Fri… you know I am working” Tony answered trying to hide his irritation.

“Boss, May Parker is here. Shall I ask her to wait?”

“May is here?” Tony asked more to himself than to his AI.

“Yes sir, I am afraid she is in distress.”

“Ask her to wait, I will be there in ten minutes”.

Tony quickly got up and changed in his spare clothes that he kept in his lab in case of emergencies and climbed the stairs with thoughts racing in his mind. _Why was May here?_

May looked forlorn. She always exhibited happiness and was vibrant. But three months had all it took for the lady to look old. She looked exhausted as if the tears had permanently sunk in her face like it had no other place to escape.

Tony looked up and saw Happy holding her hands. When he looked up, there was a look of relief as if he was glad that Tony came out of hiding.

“May, shall I get you a drink?” Tony asked kindly.

“No…no. I don’t want to drink” she said with a smile but it look pained.

“Is there anything I can help you with?”

“I… I would like to speak to you alone” May answered quietly as if she was afraid that even uttering a single word would turn her to a wreck.

Happy held her hand and gave a squeeze as in assurance and walked out of the room.

It took some time for May to start speaking but when she did it was rushed “I know… I know that people die. It’s natural and the pain will go away after some time. I had lost my husband long back and I accepted it. But my Pete… Pete he can’t leave like that, can he? I just don’t understand why he would do it? He never once told me like that. I just can’t accept it.”

“I know, May” Tony answered tears in his eyes “I know”.

“Everyone who came to ceremony asked me to hope that his next life is free from suffering. But I don’t get it, Peter was smart, caring and he knew to take care of himself. What sufferings he had that I didn’t know?” May asked crying.

“I have no idea, May. Peter never told anything about it.”

“Tony…I need to know. I want him back Tony. Peter used to talk about the time machine that you created. I know it is there. You could help him, you could save him” May spoke holding his hand pleading.

“I… I don’t think it works like that.”

“Of course it works, you went back in time and saved millions. Please, Tony. I can’t… I can’t accept this.”

“You don’t understand, May. Even if I save him there is still a chance that he would kill himself. We don’t know why he did it. Unless we know and we can change it, change his mind- we can’t save him” Tony spoke remembering how he had thought the exact something as the woman in front of him.

“What if I say that, you could change each of the reasons? Will you do it? Will you help my kid?”

“What do you mean, May?” Tony asked intrigued.

“Here… it’s his diary. My husband Ben had made him write entries in the diary and still he writes. Surely he would have written about what happened to him” May explained hopefully.

“You want me to read his dairy?” Tony asked shocked.

“Yes, _if it is to bring back my child, you can read it”._

May thrust the diary in Tony’s hand and walked off. Tony only had to look once to know who it belonged to. In scrawny letters that were so familiar to him, it was written “Property of Peter Parker”.

_Well … Damn._


	2. Chapter -2

Part-2

Tony stared at the diary wishing that it would disappear. He too wanted to know the reason for Peter’s decision just like May. Yet he felt reluctant to open it. What if Peter really had something big as a secret that he didn’t want others to know? What if Tony can’t help him even after knowing it?

The truth is Tony did want to know. There was guilt and anger eating him. He wanted to scold the kid for being reckless. Every day he woke up, it became harder to accept that Peter was truly gone.

Tony counted one to ten trying to stop his trembling hand. He was nervous and felt like his stomach was permanently knotted.

He randomly picked a page towards the end and found himself in tears.

The entry was dated a year back,

_27-03-2022_

_ALONE_

_18-4-2023_

_ALONE_

_ALONE! SO ALONE!_

_25-5-2023_

_WHY AM I FEELING SO LONELY?_

_30-6-2023_

_ANOTHER DAY. ALL ALONE._

Then blank.

Tony stared at the scrambled letters. There were nothing except entries written once in a month and everything read just one thing. ALONE.

The word hurt Tony more than anything. He remembered Peter visiting him in June for a week. They had worked for a prototype towards cleaner energy. Peter was so damn happy the whole time. He had even took Morgan out for some movies. Yet the single entry that he wrote during that month was ‘Alone’.

_Why did he never speak about it? What did it even mean?_

Tony rubbed his eyes tiredly feeling bone tired. Just as he was thinking to head to his bedroom, he saw a tiny paper peeking out. It was neatly folded and tucked inside the bound covers of the diary. Tony carefully took it out. This was an entry dated 15-07-2023, one day prior to Peter’s death.

_15-07-2023_

_I wonder whether life had been always like this. So bleak. There’s nothing to do. No one to turn to. I feel like there is no voice or purpose for my existence._

_People think that I am innocent, naïve and impish. If only they knew the thoughts running in my mind… Maybe they wouldn’t have put him in a pedestal. It would be nice. So nice to think about nothing, do nothing._

_The only reason why I continued to be Spiderman was to be with Tony. Tony… I wonder whether he will forgive me when he knows what I did. I hope that when the shock wears off everyone will return to their life after all life doesn’t wait for anyone._

_I feel so peaceful now. I used to be so scared before. I used to wonder what will happen to May if I leave her. To Tony? To my friends?_

_But now I don’t have to be worried. May is blissful with Mr Happy. He really takes good care of her. I hope they get married soon. Tony has Morgan and Mrs Potts. I could see it in his eyes. Morgan is his world and I am glad that there is someone who would always be there for him. MJ has a girlfriend now and Ned is in India. Everyone has a life and has their life settled._

_There is no need of Spider man. No need of Peter Parker._

_All I have to do is to let go._

Tony stared and stared. Then threw the diary away cursing “Fuck you! Fuck you! I had Pepper? Morgan? How the hell would I happy with them? How would I, when you were my favourite?” Tony cried throwing every single thing he got in hand.

_Why? How could he?_

“Dad, you okay?” Morgan asked clearly worried as she saw him tearing the whole room apart.

Tony stopped for a second to look at his baby girl and felt like shattering to pieces. The tears kept rolling down his face. Morgan carefully approached him and held him in a hug repeating over and over again “it’s okay dad. It’s okay”.

_It wasn’t._

Xxxxxxxxxxx

The next two days saw Tony vehemently reading the diary and making notes. Bruce had come down in the lab once and as usual he was denied. Ever since the conference, Tony stopped meeting others except for mission. Times like this Bruce really missed Rogers and Natasha. They knew how to deal with him but he always felt clueless in these situations.

On the third day Tony crashed asking Friday to run simulations. He asked Friday to prepare every possibility that she could think of that would aid him. _He will bring Peter back._

Tony was heading back to the lab when he saw a tall figure standing near the window. His cape was floating beside him as if it too was enjoying the beauty of the city.

“Glad to see that you are still alive, magician” Tony addressed the sorcerer who had appeared out of the blue. He decided to make anti magic barriers just in case the infuriating wizard decided to show up again.

“Tony, I would like to speak with you” Dr Strange said moving to the sofa to sit.

“You are talking to me” Tony retorted.

“Mr Stark, I would like to know what you are trying to do.”

“What I am trying to do? I am going to drink my coffee, Strange”.

“That’s not what I meant” Strange replied exasperated.

“_Then what did you mean?” _Tony asked beginning to feel an oncoming headache.

“Stark, what are you trying to do with Peter? Are you trying to bring him back?”

Tony clutched his fist and tried hard not to punch the irritating wizard in front of him. Even Tony couldn’t be this frustrating to others.

“You really are a trip, you know. Impeccable timing with your orange firework. Every time you come to see me there will be some impending disaster awaiting. It seems like you are repellent to lucky charm. Or is this love, Stephen? Are you so worried for my well-being? I am married, you know.”

“I don’t have time for your childish acts, Stark” Stephen replied coldly.

“Cool, I don’t have time either for such cold bastards”.

“Stark, I came to warn you that bringing back dead have consequences. It would affect everyone around you”.

“How would it affect others? I am just going to go back in time and meet Peter in times of distress and show my support. I know I could do that. For Christ sake, I brought back millions. It’s just one soul, I could do this” Tony answered folding his arms.

“I know you can. I don’t have any doubt about it. But it will change your fate, your path. Things won’t be the same.”

“You know something that others don’t, do you?” Tony asked suspicious.

“I know enough to know that if you are involving with him, it could change your life.”

“Look at me Stephen. I am a drunk old person with a wife who wants to leave as soon as my kid is old enough. What’s more to lose?” Tony asked without any mirth.

“You could lose Morgan. You could lose yourself if you invest in Peter’s life. I won’t ask you to stop but there will be consequences if you alter a person’s fate.”

“Uh… uh” Tony answered noncommittally.

“I must leave then, until next time Stark” and then Strange departed.

“See you when next shit storm arise, Wizard” Tony bid him farewell all through the while the words ‘Morgan’ ringing in his head.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Tony felt at a loss. He had a solid plan. Jot down the main incidents occurred to Peter, write a note to himself back then to guide his old self to support Peter. In the back of his mind he knew that all it will take would be one encounter for his old self to understand how much ….pure Peter was.

But that chanced encounter will be difficult. The first date in Peter’s bound diary was back fourteen years ago and fourteen years back _Tony Stark _was an asshole with a habit of getting drunk and was on the way to death. To deal with another child would be least of the worries. God, he wished that his stubborn self would acknowledge its importance.

But Strange’s words were unsettling. He hated that man but every word that he spoke held some kind of cryptic meaning.

Tony while he was not bothered to make a sacrifice he wasn’t ready to make a deal that would harm Morgan. Never. He would kill himself before his girl gets harmed.

“Boss?” Friday spoke up grabbing his attention.

“Yes, dear” Tony answered out of habit.

“Would you like to see the last footage of Peter sent by Karen?” Friday asked but there was a hint of hesitation.

“Last footage?” Tony asked wondering why his AI didn’t show it until now.

“Yes. It was taken an hour before Peter’s death” Friday spoke.

“_An hour before? He wore his suit before his death?”_

“Yes, boss he wanted to contact me through Karen” AI spoke up hesitantly.

“Friday, play the footage” Tony spoke with a hint of anger. _How could his AI keep something this big from him? _His hands were shaking again.

Slowly the screen lit up again.

_“Karen, can you hear me?” Peter asked._

_“Of course, Peter. I am available to you anytime you need me. Is there something I could do for you?” Karen answered sarcastically._

_“Karen… could you get me a footage of Tony… Mr Stark?”_

_“Peter are you in distress? Should I alert Friday?” Karen’s voice sounded worried._

_“No…No silly girl. Just I wish to see him. Don’t alert him or Friday”._

_“I am sorry Peter I have to alert Friday to get a line to Boss but I could ask her not to tell to him. Will that be okay?”_

_“Yes… yes don’t alert Mr Stark though”._

_“Getting the line now... One. Two. Three. Connected. “Karen spoke in confirmation._

_Tony was sitting in the couch with Morgan watching Dexter’s Laboratory. His girl giggling and commenting about each one of the character. It was a typical Friday night with nothing to do but spend with his daughter. A knock was heard and Tony jumped to get the door “That would be our pizza”, Tony said ruffling the girl’s hair as he passed by._

_Inside the spidey suit Peter was crying “Tony looks happy, doesn’t he? Karen?”_

_“Yes Peter, its Friday night which means ‘Do Not Disturb its Morgan time’ Night”_

_Peter laughed though tears were falling down his eyes._

_“I hope that Tony will always be happy. I hope that he will live a long life”_

_“Peter, are you sure that you don’t want to contact Mr Stark?”_

_“No… NO. I just want to get fresh air. Yeah. Yeah air. Karen?”_

_“Yes, Peter?”_

_“You are the best partner in crime though don’t tell to Ned that I told that”._

_“I won’t Peter. Your secret is safe with me”._

End of footage.

“Friday, why didn’t you alert me?” Tony asked furiously.

“I am sorry Sir. But Peter’s command is second to yours as per the protocol.”

“Why not tell me later when I was racking my brain, huh?”

“Cause, you were in distress, Sir. I didn’t want to cause any more”.

“Fuck it! Fuck it!” Tony cursed in rage wondering how he missed this. _Besides why would he want to see him before his death?_

“Friday, did he contact May then?”

“No, sir. It was only you that he contacted” Friday confirmed.

Tony sat on the floor beginning to understand what Dr Strange meant.


	3. Chapter 3

Part-3

“I am gonna do this, Fri. Wish me luck” Tony said already wearing the white suit and ready to go through the portal. Tony had sent Morgan to Rhodey who was practically showering her with gifts. He had no qualms to take her in. In fact he was so happy that Tony had started to talk again to him.

_If only Rhodey knew._

Nothing deterred him though. He will find a way to stop Peter. But first he had to take care of one thing.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

22 November 2010

Tony woke up late as always stumbling to the lab. He quickly thought over his plan. Uh. Nothing. Pepper had asked him to stay in his penthouse for few days as the episode with rogue robots had just died down. People were forgetting the incident. No need to invoke Satan a.k.a Tony Stark into it.

So currently Tony was jobless and increasingly frustrated. With Pepper being the C.E.O she hardly had time to take care of herself let alone her new boyfriend. Sometimes Tony missed the attention, the mind numbing parties. But he had promised himself that he wanted to stay in relationship with Pepper. That means adios to party.

Tony can be patient if he want to. Yes. He can.

But currently he was running out of patient.

“JARVIS, baby be dear and light the candles” Tony said clapping his hands.

Jarvis already aware of his inventor’s antics lit up the lab which was followed by chirping of DUM E and U.

“Hello to you too, my children” He said patting DUM –E but then noticed that DUM –E was clutching a letter in his claws.

“Hey DUM-E, where did you get that?” Tony asked looking around to see any intruder and found no one.

DUM-E in return handed the letter to Tony and whirled back to his station. He opened and found a note addressing to ‘Anthony Edward Stark’

_‘Tony, it might come as a surprise to you that I am YOU from the future. Year 2023 to be exact. I came here to talk about something-a mission, actually. Only you could do it and I hope you will try your best._

_There’s a boy named Peter parker in Queens who is exceptionally talented. In the future you are going to be his mentor and he will be a superhero under the name spider man. But now he is young. Only ten or eleven years old. I want you to go over there and meet Peter. He needs your support now. And trust me when I say this- you will love him._

_He is smart and you will be proud of him._

_It’s important that you meet him. Because in my time, Peter is no more. Peter has committed suicide and we couldn’t do anything about it. _

_So please, give him a chance._

_Meet him._

_P.s: I know you are skeptical about the whole future thing but I could tell you one thing that would make you believe. The red convertible of your dad was smashed by you with a baseball but luckily someone had tried to steal the car that day. So you put the blame on him. You and I know that it happened when you were seven years old and Jarvis wasn’t there to record this._

_P.P.S: Please meet him._

_From_

_Tony Stark – Year 2023._

Tony closed his eyes and opened it again wondering what on Earth he had woke up to.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Tony asked Jarvis to check for any ‘Peter Parker’ in Queens and sure enough there was one and what’s more his AI didn’t even have to be invasive to find him. Peter was already famous in the news that is, his uncle Benjamin was murdered in a robbery and the kid was its sole witness. He almost felt sympathy to the boy.

Downing the scotch in his hand, Tony called Happy giving instruction to the address of Parker residence.

Tony had drove down to the place only to know that Parkers didn’t live there anymore. The kid and aunt had decided to move to a flat and had put the place for auction. He wondered where the kid’s parents were.

“If you are looking for Parkers, they will be in church. Today is Benjamin’s funeral ceremony. You could meet them there.” An old guy passing by answered to the inquiry of Happy.

“Boss, church or Stark Tower?” Happy asked getting back in the driver seat.

“To the church” Tony answered looking back at the phone trying to gather further information on Parker family.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Peter was sitting on the church lawn when he saw a black convertible rolling up near the huge pine tree. He didn’t know who it was but May had specifically instructed to meet with the people who attended the ceremony.

As he got up from the lawn, he saw a man dressed impeccably getting out and Peter’s eyes widened in surprise.

Tony put on his signature sun glass to disguise himself. Happy had agreed to go to the church and ask about the boy. But as his driver prepared to climb the stairs leading to church he saw a boy running towards them.

“Mr Stark! Mr Stark! I knew it was you! I knew it was you!” the boy cried in surprise.

Tony smiled amused. While there were always fans surrounding him, praising him and trying to be close with him-most of them were girls or leeches who wanted a part of wealth of Tony or looking for a good time. It was the first time he saw a kid jumping in such happiness to meet him. He was almost engrossed in the antics that he failed to listen to the kid’s rambling.

“You know, your initiative for using the arc reactor for generating electricity is so amazing. Imagine if… if small versions of arc reactor can be made? It could be used to power a lot of it, like we could use it as pace maker, right?”

“Kid, you know about arc reactor?” Tony asked in marvel.

“Of course, Mr Stark. My uncle Ben bought me all kind of science magazine and I am a huge fan of your inventions and Professor Banner. Oh! Oh! I love Iron man too” Peter answered his cheeks blushing.

“Of course, what’s not to like?” Tony asked winking.

“I… you talked to me in Stark Expo. You complimented me saying ‘good work kid’ when I showed up thruster to fight the bots. You saved me then”. Peter answered still awestruck.

“Wait, you were that kid” Damn, how could Tony forget that stubborn child who decided to show his fake thrusters to fight off a bot. If he hadn’t noticed it then, the kid would have not been here now.

“You Peter Parker, is one stubborn kid but can we move to somewhere shady? I need to speak with you” Tony asked to which Peter eagerly nodded.

Tony could right away understand what his future self spoke about the boy. One meeting and all he wanted to do was protect the kid and shelter him from the evils in the world. Which he can’t do all of a sudden but he could assure it.

Peter sat next him on a bench and stared at Tony, his idol to know what he wanted to speak about. For just a second he forgot about Uncle Ben, the devastating days and the fact that he have to move again from his home. First was when his parents died in an air crash. He was then worried that he will be send to an orphanage. They almost did until Ben and May showed up. They took him in, gave him a place to stay and encouraged him to follow his dreams.

Yet now they were asked to move and this too was his fault. He couldn’t save Uncle Ben.

Tony on the other hand was watching the kid. Peter seemed like he was losing all the enthusiasm when they waited. He was increasingly growing pale and his eyes were distant. Tony knew all about it. He knew it was the guilt eating the kid and so he decided to interrupt Peter’s thought.

“Pete, do you like your present school?”

Peter’s reply came immediately although a bit sad “I do, Mr stark. Unfortunately we have to shift from the house and I have to transfer to another school. Aunt May says it’s okay. So it will be okay”.

“Uhm, I will talk about that to May. Do you need anything else?”

“Can I see your arc reactor in the lab?” Peter asked jumping up with enthusiasm.

“I…I am afraid not, Pete. May be when you are older.”

Peter looked forlorn but then gave him a smile and replied “Yeah Okay”.

“Great. Here is my card. You can use it whenever you need me, okay. Now let me meet your aunt”.

Pete looked at the card awestruck and gave a dazzling smile and ran back to church to take him to his aunt.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

It took an hour for Tony to get back to Happy. He spoke with Aunt May and said that Peter will get a scholarship so that he could stay in the same school. The scholarship will include transportation too, so she didn’t have to worry for commutation.

He wanted to offer money for a better apartment but he knew that Aunt May will be skeptical. So he decided to help the kid. _Right, one step at a time._

“How did it go, boss?” Happy asked conversationally.

“It went as I expected” Tony replied and tried to read the further notes that he got from his future self.

_“To Anthony Edward Stark,_

_If you meet the boy, he will tell you that he is moving to another school. I want you to stop him from changing school. Although he had later moved back to the same school after few years, he still regret the decision of leaving._

_Cause he was bullied._

_His classmates had blamed him for his uncle’s death._

_I want you to stop him from Transferring School in whichever way you could”_

_From_

_Tony (Year 2023)._

Tony closed the letter and looked out through the window.

‘_Maybe what I did as the letter said was the best’ _he mused as he watched the trees turning into a blur outside.


	4. Chapter 4

Part-4

Tony flew down to the ground to stand beside Captain Rogers and Hulk. It would have been comical to see six superheroes to stand in a circle had it not been the chituaris trying to attack them. Currently all he wanted was to blast the point break to oblivion. Because ever since the Norse God Thor had come down to Earth seeking his brother, there had been nothing but destruction and death. Whatever the big guy had for his younger sibling- Loki, all Tony wanted to do was struggle that arrogant guy.

_‘2012 is truly the worst year of my life’_ Tony mused as he flew Agent Barton to the highest building.

All of the avengers were trying their best to defeat the army led by Loki but it just kept coming from the portal above. They were running out of options and energy when Fury made the call. The officials had detonated a bomb that would lay waste to the entire city.

All of them were scared and for a minute they forgot everything about the aliens. _This was their_ _home. _Thousands of people were still stuck in the debris, they were just moved to a better place for protection.

_What protection they have if the entire city was going to be nuked?_

Tony’s mind was racing. He thought about those people who had started the day as usual but only to see their homes destroyed, their loved ones injured. _No matter what the innocent shouldn’t suffer._

So Tony made a plan. Well in his case, the plan was obvious – sacrifice himself.

But none of the others got his plan because they were gaping at him when he flew along the bomb’s direction and took it further upwards.

He heard Steve’s belligerent question “Stark just what you think you are doing?”

“I think I found a spot for the bomb to explode, Cap” Tony answered sarcastically and flew towards the portal where chituari army kept coming.

“Stark, you are gonna die” Steve shouted. It almost sounded like he was crying.

“You got any other options?” Tony asked for which none of the avengers replied.

As he flew upwards, he thought how he ended up in this situation. He had a girlfriend now. Pepper will be furious, she will call him reckless and selfish. He truly was. And Peter? The kid who looked up to him like he hung the stars and called him to tell about the test that he aced or scientific inventions? Will he forgive him? It didn’t matter now.

He asked Jarvis to connect to Pepper but she didn’t pick up the call. Probably still in the business meeting. ‘_Oh God, I am going to die alone’ _Tony thought as he was nearing the portal.

Just as he was entering it he heard his communication interface trying to connect. He closed his eyes with relief feeling happy that he will hear Pepper’s voice before he die. But the sound on the other end surprised him.

_It was Peter._

“Mr Stark! Tony! You can’t do this. You can’t fly into that. You can’t. I need you! Come back” Peter screamed through the phone.

“Shh, sweet heart it will be alright, Ok? You have a present waiting for you” Tony soothed the child whose cry was turning to hysterics.

“Tony! Tony! I don’t want gifts. You come back! You can’t leave me. You come back!”

_“Sir, I am having difficulties to maintain connection” _Jarvis distorted voice came through and Tony sniffled trying not to cry.

“Jarvis, tell Peter I am sorry” and Tony cut off the call.

Beside him he saw the bomb exploding and the portal collapsed in. Before he closed his eyes in resignation, he saw the vast void and a shiver ran through him.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Tony sat in the chair taking his shwarma roll. It was truly a miracle that he didn’t die. As per Banner’s explanation, he fell through the sky before the portal caving in and the hulk had caught him.

He made it and all he could think about was Peter. He just prayed that the kid will be fine.

“Let’s go to hospital, after this Tony” Steve said as they were finishing the meal.

“No, I am fine capsicle. I just need a good rest and I will be okay” Tony dismissed Steve’s idea.

“But, you are injured. We need to look into it” Steve retorted.

“I will check upon him, Captain” Banner spoke up knowing full well of Tony’s hatred to hospitals.

“See, it’s a date” Tony said cheekily.

“I will bring the quinjet here” Natasha said getting up.

Everyone consented to the idea as everyone wanted to go home.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Tony got out as the quinjet touched down the stark tower. His leg was wounded making it hard to walk. Limping he walked in followed by the team members and there was Loki sitting up after the hulk smash.

“If it’s all the same to you, I will have the drink now” Loki spoke up with a twinkle in his eyes.

_Huh, some God._

Just as they were ready to apprehend Loki, Jarvis spoke up “You have a visitor, sir”

“Tell them to wait up, J” Tony said his repulsor still pointed at Loki.

“The boy is persistent, Sir. He is currently trying to break the glass with a pot sir. Should I despatch a suit?” Jarvis asked ready to take action.

“Did you say boy?” Tony asked shocked.

“Yes sir, Peter Parker is here to see you”.

Tony didn’t even look up as he rushed to meet the boy who was trying to break through the doors.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

“Open this door now! Or! Or! I will break it! I swear I will break it!” Peter shouted in rage.

“Kid, what you doing here?” Tony asked as soon as the door opened.

Peter just ran towards him and started punching him earnestly.

“Oww! Ouch! Peter I am hurt! Peter stop!”

“You can’t leave me, Mr Stark! You can’t.” Peter cried still hitting Tony but with little force.

“You know I won’t leave you, right. Come along now” He said and put the shut in protocol so that no one will come into the room.

“You are lying! Jarvis told me that you said sorry” Peter screamed rubbing his eyes.

“I am sorry. I am really sorry.” Tony spoke and hugged the boy trying to hide his own tears seeing how earnestly Peter was looking at him.

“Don’t ever do that” Peter commanded.

Tony knew he can’t promise it. So he diverted the question by asking “Do you want your gift?”

That distracted the kid and he looked excited.

“Hold out your hands, Petey”

Peter did as he was told and felt a card being placed. He looked and read it- ‘Stark Tower, Level 10 clearance’.

“You are granting me access to Stark tower?” Peter asked stupendous.

“Yep”

“To the lab too?”

“Yep. In fact to everywhere including my penthouse. But you gotta knock before you enter” Tony answered ruffling the messy hair.

Peter’s response was to- flung into his arms.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Pepper had come home after two hours and was in panic. He had assure her over and over again that he was okay.

After some time, Pepper sighed and went to bed saying she was exhausted.

He briefly wondered how different Pete’s reaction been. Peter had made Tony to eat and take medicine before going back home. The kid truly cared about him.

Tony pulled out the letter that he had found in the bedside in that morning.

_‘To Anthony Edward Stark,_

_I hope that by now you have met Peter and you have a good relation with him. If you have not, this is your second chance. As per Pete’s diary, he was scared when he watched Chituari attack. His friend from childhood was trapped in the debris and he felt bad about it. This is one of the few reasons that he wanted to do something to protect others. The beginning of a super hero._

_I want to warn you about today but by now you would have known about chituari invasion. I could ask you to change a lot of things that happened today, to run away but I know you. You will keep taking the same decisions that I took in the past. Besides this isn’t about us. This is about Peter._

_Please take care of him. He need you._

_From_

_Tony Stark (Year 2023)_

Tony sighed and folded the letter, the letter was true. Peter was worried about his friend- Jake but he was even more worried about Tony. The letter never mentioned about it.

The letter never mentioned about how Peter was the one who had comforted him. The future was already changing and he was hoping that with this Peter’s death can also be avoided.

_‘I will save him in future’ _Tony thought as he saw the Vicks bottle that Peter had brought along to apply on him.


End file.
